Sex Therapy
We’re wired for pleasure and connection.
If something's gotten tangled up, let's sort it out. We can help.
At SPARK, we offer sex therapy that is pleasure-centered, sex-positive, and integrated into the big picture of your life. We can help you create the sex life you’ve always wanted.
What happens in sex therapy?
We talk. About all sorts of things. You’ll get good suggestions but sex therapy offers a lot more than tips and tricks. We help people know themselves better, know their partners better, and learn how to resolve problems that have kept them from a fun, joyful experience of sexuality. Whether you’re curious about how to improve your intimate relationship, dealing with life changes or medical crises, wanting to shift your perspective and values around sex, we’ve got you covered.
It’s all in a day’s work!
Sex therapists each have their own unique specialties, but generally speaking we treat desire, arousal, and orgasm problems as well as the relationships in which these problems exist. Reworking relationships with desire, pleasure, and vulnerability, restoring meaningful connections, guiding people into intimacy and connection, confidently handling complex dynamics that lead couples to the brink of divorce…that and so much more!
Whatever you’re dealing with, you’ll be in good hands at SPARK.
01 Assessment
We start with a thorough assessment of the problem you want to address to get an understanding of why it’s happening and what’s keeping it from getting better. We talk about the past, the present, and the future in these sessions. We’ll meet individually and you’ll have a session together if you’re in a relationship. Don’t worry if you’re not…some of the best sex therapy can happen when people are single.
02 Feedback
After a few meetings, you’ll have a feedback session with your sex therapist where you’ll hear about her understanding of the problem and find out what suggestions she has for how to meet the goals you identified during the Assessment sessions. Suggestions might include individual, couples, or sex therapy at SPARK, and they’ll also likely involve resources outside of SPARK. It takes a village, after all.
03 Treatment
If we’ve decided to work together, off we go! we’re off! We’ll meet virtually or in the office to work through the treatment plan we created. Typically people have sessions 2-3 times per month at first. Since most of the ‘work’ of sex therapy happens between sessions, people need time in between meetings to ‘be in the lab’. You can reach out for support or clarification in between sessions when you need to
Issues we help with
Whether you’re curious about intimacy, dealing with life changes, or wanting to shift your perspective and values around sex, we’ve got you covered. Sometimes, we simply need help bringing new insights into patterns that are greatly influencing our relationships. Sexuality and intimate relationships are core parts of who we are. It’s worth the effort to tend to those things when they need tending. We’ve got lots of ways to do this, but usually it involves looking at, exploring, talking about things like:
- Intrapersonal and Interpersonal Concerns
Sexual confidence, sexual self-esteem; ability to trust yourself and decide when to trust others; addressing inhibitions, fears, and general discomfort with sexuality; ability to clarify wants and needs and set boundaries effectively; ‘coming out’ by telling the truth in spaces where the truth can be told; communication problems; affair recovery; sexual conflicts; problems with extended family or children; issues relating to sexual orientation and gender identity; history of traumatic experiences, sexual or otherwise; learning to be more emotionally expressive; body image…cooperating with our bodies, honoring the wisdom of the body, grieving / accepting changes that come from age, injury, or illness; re-igniting the spark in long term relationships
- Intersections of Sexuality
Mental health concerns: Performance Anxiety…realizing that sex is about relating, being flexible improv, and success is defined by showing up, being present / kind to self and partner; feeling calm and confident
- Desire Problems
Low or absent sexual desire; wanting more, less, or different from what your partner wants; having troubling turn-ons; coming to terms with being kinky, having a fetish, or being interested / oriented toward some sort of ‘alternative lifestyle’ sexually or relationally; feeling compulsive or out of control sexually; co-creating a sex life with a partner that works beautifully for both of you.
- Substance use disorders
- Arousal Problems
Erection problems in men; lubrication problems in women.
- Medical concerns
Painful intercourse; pelvic pain; adjusting to new physical realities due to illness, injury, or the normal course of aging.
- Orgasm Problems
Never had an orgasm; not experiencing pleasure with orgasm; finding orgasm difficult to experience; rapid ejaculation
- Cultural and religious impacts
Repression, unholy trinity of guilt/shame/fear to control sexuality
FAQ's
- How does it work? What do I have to do in sessions?
Because each person has different issues and goals for therapy, therapy will be different depending on the individual. I tailor my therapeutic approach to your specific needs.
- Is everything I share in therapy confidential?
Yes, your privacy is a top priority. Therapists follow strict ethical guidelines to ensure confidentiality, with very few exceptions (such as situations involving harm to yourself or others).
- Do I need to be in a relationship to see a sex therapist?
No, sex therapy is for individuals as well as couples. Whether you’re single, dating, married, or exploring your sexuality, therapy can help you gain insight, work through concerns, and build a healthier relationship with intimacy and pleasure.
- Is sex therapy just talking, or are there physical exercises involved?
Sex therapy is talk-based, meaning there are no physical exams or sexual activity in sessions. However, your therapist may provide guided exercises, educational resources, or mindfulness techniques to practice at home to support your progress.
Some problems can’t wait.
And some have waited long enough.
If you think therapy might be a good idea, reach out and let’s talk about it.